A Note from Bruce

Before I go into detail on this post, I just want to say thanks for taking the time to visit Illuminati Watchdog. Your time spent here is greatly appreciated. I wanted to write this post to let those know that have been frequenting this site that after eight years I have decided to call it quits on writing about all things Illuminati. In fact, this blog was never really intended to last this long, but as time passed and the articles increased, it continued. However, times have changed so much since I first started writing this. In January 2013, conspiracy theories were much more entertaining to explore with only fringe elements really embracing them. By 2016, that started to change as the fringe shifted, and conspiracies began to become more mainstream. Today, they have become ubiquitous as elected officials and even so-called journalists publicize them on social media without any thought about the consequences. In other words, what started as a fun pastime has turned into a potentially toxic activity. I can no longer in good faith continue to write these articles, no matter how outlandish, unbelievable, or humorous I can make them.

When I started Illuminati Watchdog, I did so as a kind of joke. All of the articles are satire aimed to poke fun of actual conspiracy theorists. As time passed and the comments accumulated, I realized that many who stumbled upon this website thought they were genuine. That was never my intention, but it never really seemed like a concern until after the 2016 election. By 2020, bogus theories surrounding the coronavirus, Q-Anon, and supposed voter fraud have done much to undermine public trust in many institutions essential to the preservation of American democracy. With too many individuals taking these seriously and knowing that people read what I have written and believe it's fully credible, it's time to throw in the towel.

With that said, I'd like to take a few moments to explain how I came up with so much Illuminati nonsense. It's fairly simple actually. All you need to do is begin watching movies and looking for triangles, eyes, and references to the sun. Add some imagination to it, and voila, instant conspiracy theories. Some of these were really fun to write, and I'll provide a list of my favorites in this post too. Please be sure to check them out. They may not be true, but they're entertaining. In regard to the others, some were just mediocre at best that I cranked out when I felt like I needed to add something. Believe it or not, some of those got the most page views. Go figure! Once I noticed the pattern, I realized the less thought I put into these the better.   

I will say some of my favorite memories of doing Illuminati Watchdog were seeing where my material got quoted. One morning, I LOL'd pretty hard when I saw parts of my McDonald's article reproduced in the UK's Telegraph. Another occasion was seeing several pieces posted on Fundies Say the Darndest Things with people commenting on how ludicrous the conspiracies were. One commenter even suggested I was schizophrenic. I guess they didn't see the satire either. My other favorite memory was probably trolling some of the people that came on the site trying to debunk my easily debunkable theories. Oh, how they had no idea about what they truly were posting about.

So without further ado, here's my list of favorite articles here on Illuminati Watchdog. If you haven't read them yet, take some time and enjoy.

1. The Empire Strikes Back and the War on Drugs: This must be my all time favorite. I was inspired to write this one when I was watching the movie and saw the ice planet Hoth and thought, "Hey, that looks like a giant ball of cocaine." Hell, given how much drug use occurred when filming movies back then, it probably wasn't far from the truth.

2. Illuminati Symbolism in Ghostbusters: Being one of my favorite movies, I gotta say that when Sigourney Weaver opened that fridge and there appeared a pyramid, this one wrote itself.

3. The Illuminati Wants to Put Donald Trump on Permanent Display: Being one of my last articles, this one came to mind as I was reading about Trump's bromance with Kim Jong Un. This is probably very unlikely to happen, but wouldn't it be hilarious if it did?

4. Warnings of JFK's Assassination in Gone with the Wind: I was really surprised that no one had come up with this one yet. A character named Kennedy gets shot in the head in a film made two decades before JFK's assassination and no one makes the connection? I guess most conspiracy theorists don't think there was any symbolism in movies before Stanley Kubrick.

5. 9/11 Warnings in Home Alone: I have to admit that the final editing in this film really does present some eerie coincidences, but that's really all they are. I had fun connecting the dots on this one.

With that said, thanks for reading and please don't buy into conspiracy theories. America landed on the moon, Apple devices are not the mark of the beast, and Biden won in 2020. 

All the best,

Bruce